"But there are much worse games to play." (cries hysterically)

Okay, not hysterically-- but I swear the book could not have ended more unexpectedly or bittersweet. The author definitely does not cheat the reader by making everything OK in the end after all Katniss goes through... Oh-- hello there-- I'm talking about The Hunger Games trilogy. Finished Mockingjay just a few minutes ago.

Speaking of The Hunger Games, I was really proud of myself for pulling off the final book's release event that the bossman said would not happen. Firstly, the person who was originally going to do the event was told not to show up, and then I appear a mere thirty minutes before the thing is supposed to go on and find that the planning materials cannot be accessed. Ten minutes prior to the big show and Ashley has Marty fax over the trivia/debate forms from Westlake, and then I'm thrown into a somewhat haphazard and spontaneous release party, which actually turned out well.

I snagged Matt at the last second to host with me-- always good to have your pal for backup-- and we did a great job considering only four people showed up, half of them moms. Well, can't say we didn't try. We were complimented on our good job afterwards, but that may have been because of the free Fruitkulas, though Fan Mom #2 claims I entertained well while Matt was whisked away to prepare the drinks in the cafe.

I learned something about myself yesterday. I was really hoping I wouldn't screw it up, no matter how few people showed up. I have never considered myself good with a) kids or b) being a host, but I found that I had exceeded my own expectations. Who cares that the fifteen-year-old wearing the Hunger Games t-shirt took one look at the two 10-year-old kids in the party area before turning tail and slinking out the front door to my shouts of "Hey! The event is starting!"

Her loss! Fan Kid #1 won a bookplate signed by Suzanne Collins. Fan Mom #2 actually had the nerve to pipe up "Is that all that's in the raffle?" Yes, woman! You thought we'd been preparing this for weeks, ha ha. It was my smooth execution that fooled her. You would never have thought that none of my lines were premeditated. Of course, Matt was involved-- but he's a natural speaker. I never thought I had it in me.

In other news, I ran ten miles yesterday. Have to admit, it wasn't easy-- by mile eight I had a stitch in my side, but I plowed through it, just to see if I could. I could. No lasting damage, and now I am more powerful than ever-- MU-A-ha ha ha ha!!

Listening to Pink's song "Glitter in the Air" over and over again. Go listen.

And. um.

Let's see.

It is two days before my chapter with Borders comes to an inevitable and oh-so-tragic-but-SO-not tragic END! And I promise on the lives of my unborn children that I will never return. Never. Ever. Ever. If I'm going to be treated like muck, it might as well be by people who are higher up the letter-ladder than me-- you know, letters like P and H and D. But I have a feeling I will not be paid to be The Idiot Who Will Take Your Call again.

SUCCESS!!

Oh, and I'm sorry Jana... T-minus 24 days!

Fi-yi-yine

Which comedian said that? Pablo Francisco? Whenever I think of the word "fine" I have to sing it like that now. Well, that's how I'm feeling. Just a breezy, quiet morning in the Laura and Justin residence, waiting for Justin to awaken and perhaps scavenge for some food with me. I have met the most terrifying monster in the universe, Cthulhu, and he curled up next to me last night. As much of a purr-box as Obi, but of course, a billion times more fearsome.

If you haven't already discovered Lamebook.com, and you want a big waste of time, I highly suggest this website. It takes all the funniest/stupidest/most awkward facebook statuses, comments and pictures, and compiles them all into one convenient location, just for your viewing pleasure.

Today I will go to the USCIS (Unusual Slightly-Changed Irate Silverbacks) to get my biometrics taken (they will surgically remove all my organs and replace them with cheese puffs); then I will sign a form that declares my soul is theirs but can be borrowed for a little while by England, after which I will do a lot more things, and get my visa.

Oh, visa-- the silent killer. Was I naive enough to think that my US money vomiting days would end with the passport and multiple international-going letters? "Muahaha!" says Vaudevillean US moustache-twirling villain, "You thought you would give England all the money you don't have, and leave US with nothing? Reaallyyy? Mooa ha ha! FOOL!"

But seriously, $330, what the hell?

No wonder Americans are the least likely to own passports in the western world-- they make it hard enough!!

AHHH NOW my good mood is tainted by ranting- AAHHHH!!!!-- just kidding, I'm still in a good mood. Well, signing off for now, ta!

T-minus 30 days and counting!

Dream Belamy: A Second Helping

Now there are three more chapters of Dream Belamy available to read. Enjoy!

Words are like Animorphs

The reason I like the Oxford English Dictionary is because it makes you realize that words are not static in their definitions-- anyone can change them as long as they have already established themselves as important wordsmiths or intelligentsia. Having a certain level of mastery of English, and allowing people to know about it, automatically puts you in the "I can change words" category. How amazing is that?

But we, the commonfolk, are taught that words have a particular definition, and if we use words in ways different from Merriam-Webster, we are considered unlearned and idiotic. Who says you can't pronounce "niche" like nitch? Or "omnipotent" like OMni-potent? What if it sounds cooler to pause before the "potent"? James Murray (the editor of the 1st ed. of the OED) said you should always pronounce the p at the beginning of words such as "pneumonia". I mean, I don't see anyone doing that, but nobody called him a dumbass because he tried.

Words evolve, just like everything else. That is one thing I like about them. They are uncertain little clusters of phonemes that only mean something if at least two people agree on them. Words didn't even have correct spellings until after the mid-18th century, probably even later. Even names were spelled every which way. That is, until dictionaries started to be produced, and then more people got literated, and the important idiots decided each word needed to have one spelling only, so they could make fun of the people who got it wrong.

And I didn't even read the OED; it's unfathomably expensive. I just get the word of the day by e-mail here. But if you sign up for it, it will not only tell you the many definitions of one word, but also the evolution of that word, from its earliest form to the present, which kicks dictionary.com's word of the day in the ass.

I love words.

Iron Man on the Freeway

Sometimes when I'm driving and a motorcyclist shoots ahead of me, I see a different person for a minute... once, I thought I saw Iron Man in his sleek red and gold armor, and tonight as I was driving home I thought I saw a caped crusader. But by the time I caught up to them, they always turned back into some leather-clad guy with a mullet, or a combination of two robust people, one in black and one with a very billowy red windbreaker.

This week has been strange-- due to a) lack of sleep and b) stress about school; "a" is not the result of "b" by the way, as "a" is the result of a strange work schedule and being popular, and "b" is in isolated addition to "a". A de-bonus, if you will.

I didn't get as much school loan $ as I had hoped, so whether I get to eat or not in Leicester depends on if I sell my car. I need to sell my car as fast as possible because I'm paranoid it will die on me before I can reap some income out of it. The other day I backed it out of the driveway and almost went into cardiac arrest when it made thumping noises as I braked-- "I knew I had to replace that master cylinder!" I screamed in my head-- "DAMN YOU NTB, and your careless OVERLOOKAGE of VITAL REPAIRS!" I burst into the house in a wild pinwheeling rage, grabbed my mom's key, and joked out the door that I would silently cry on my way to work about the state of my car. We laughed about it but I actually did, for just a little while. "Oh God--" I thought through my grief, listening to Hey There Delilah on the radio, "--I hate this song."

I blundered through three hours of work before finally calling my mom to ask what had happened on her test drive of my hunk of vanished cash. "You're weird," said Mum, "your car works fine."

See, I already told you I was paranoid. But I'm working on it. I finally understand what Stephen meant about running off your frustration-- it works great. Pounding out six miles to My Chemical Romance screaming something about vampires really takes the edge off.

T-minus 40 days, and counting!

UNI is gonna ROCK

Dream Belamy

In the sidebar of my blog, you will see, just under the page labeled "Who am I?" a new page by the title "Dream Belamy: A Novel". Here you will find a sample of three adventures. Enjoy!

Tao Moment

It was after my early morning run with the uncomfortable old-man hellos and ignoring the regulars such as Guy-with-Small-Brown-Dog... after feeling cocky on the carride home because I passed up a serious runner... after suddenly choking on a mouthful of water, spitting it everywhere and realizing the forces of nature were telling me I shouldn't be cocky... after all that, I went home, took a shower, then climbed into bed for my nap--

but it was unusual...

I noticed how close my bed was to the window, how comfy I was right up close to the outside world, and it was all dark and looked ready to rain, so everything had a closed quality to it, and I just lay there at peace, not thinking about anything except that I hoped I didn't pick up where I left off with my last dream, where I had just saved my pig baby named Krul from a wild badger cos I had accidentally forgotten about her outside in the yard... and I wished I had named her something that couldn't be mistaken with the word "cruel". Lucky for me, I fell blissfully into dreamless sleep.

Today was the last day for all the members of our short-lived book club. But where one chapter ends, another begins! Everyone must go their separate ways, and I like the way I'm going, which is east, but not TOO far east, just east enough to get to the older part of The West. Logic!

By the way, so going through late editing stages with my first full-length childrens fantasy novel. Epic. Win. I gave Jana a copy of draft 2-and-then-some. I have felt this need to edit it at stupid times, like in the middle of work when I can't get to it. I can only describe the frustrating feeling of not being able to work on something important as a "twing". God I hate twings.

Running Running Running

I thought I'd mention how much I love running. I feel like I talk about it a lot, but seriously, it's better than drugs. I love gettin' all sweaty and goin' nowhere but doing it fast. I like considering myself an athlete even though I've never thought so before. I like going into the same trance as when I'm reading or writing, forgetting about my body working away mechanically as I just think and breathe.

Actually, I need to get laid.

www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts

"Even for the internet it's... pretty shocking." Ha ha ha.

When I was a kid and people would say "you're here for a reason" I always imagined a guy with a checklist analyzing me before I was born (I thought I would have looked like a kid before I was born, but now I think I probably looked like a range of microscopic particles of energy spread across the universe, but that will probably change, too.)

Anyway, the checklist guy determines how you're going to live your life, where you're going to live, who you're going to be stuck with, etc. He's also the one who decided to give me themed days, in which, every now and then, one subject will present itself in multiple ways all in different places within the same 24-hr period. I've noticed that this happens to me occassionally-- for example, two different people will mention the same weird topic offhand that they have never spoken of before. Or, I will be watching a TV show I've never watched before, and realize later that the new book I'm reading is about the same thing.

I think the themed days help me to realize the lessons of life. Yesterdays lesson was "Girls sure seem to get abducted a lot", also, "If they're abducted young enough they'll love the new family (The Face on the Milk Carton)", and, "If they're abducted when they're like 12 they're not going to forget their old family very soon (Lie to Me, episode 6)" so if you're going to abduct somebody, do it when they're 2 or 3.

Ah, life lessons.